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Eternals

Unearthed: The Eternals #3

Wait, what? We’re BACK? WHO could have FORESEEN… okay. On we go to The Eternals #3!

Check out Ikaris’s crazy outfit! Honestly, I think this is a much cooler costume than most of Marvel’s other heroes’. Note how it does away with the undershorts motif in favor of the much more classical loincloth, or BREECHCLOTH if you’re fancy.

Here we see the amazingly-clad Ajax. But we won’t see him that much longer! I’m going to assume it’s not because Ajax isn’t cool, ’cause he is. But look at all the ridiculous details! No, I’m gonna say it’s that. Kirby realized he put a ridiculous task before himself with Ajax’s design and regretted it. So say goodbye!

But that’s okay, ’cause look at this double-page spread! Holy cats on fire, that’s Arishem! And the super-cool design on his thumb? Well, that’s not for us to discuss in this issue! Just glory in his majesty, why don’t you?

Oh no… the Celestials are closing the area off with an impenetrable shield… and it’ll stay closed for the next fifty years! Margo’s dad is gonna stay and live out the rest of his life in blissful research. But Margo’s gotta go! She doesn’t wanna leave her dad behind, but she’s not thinking straight! She’s got her whole life ahead of her to screw up!

I feel like this should be problematic somehow, but I can’t make it stick. Something about taking agency away from Margo… but with her father’s permission, it’s… okay?

Listen, we’ve all been there. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to eye blast someone acting hysterically.

This is how the Deviants treat their generals? Some people pay good money for this kind of treatment. But ho ho Kro! What’s he got in mind, hey?

Watch Kro pull off a clever sleight of hand here…

GAH! A PINK DEVIL! But I love it when an evil plan comes together and everyone gets to laugh maniacally.

Lady, I don’t know if you know this, but kids are supposed to outlive their parents. That’s just nature. And if you still don’t have your shit together, what have you been doing with your life? Well, honestly, it doesn’t matter anymore, ’cause now you’re caught up in all this Eternals nonsense.

I’m guessing this quip of Ikaris’s is meant to be humorous, but to be fair, compared with some of the other outfits Kirby’s had people wear (see Ajax earlier in this issue), this outfit IS simple.

Stay cool, Margo! Also, stay gold, Pony Boy!

Boom! In your FACE, Ikaris! Who’s staying cool NOW?

Only Jack Kirby could revolutionize something as simple as a range finder.

Holy crap! A giant sperm is headed for New York!

Oh that Ikaris… he talks just like any ol’ normal human, dun’t he?

Anyone else find it odd that Margo says “female” instead of “woman”?

And there she is! Sersi! Or “SersY”, as they have it here. But Marvel will change it later, don’t worry. I said don’t worry! STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT!

Also, remind me to greet everyone who comes to my house with an interpretive dance.

So basically, He-Man here is dropping Margo off at daycare. Thanks, buddy! Sorry we humans are cramping your style, or whatever. But hey, let’s leave this series (for now) with one final cliffhanger image:

BAHAHAHA! The Devil is real and he’s from space! Oh no! What’ll the humans do now? We’ll return to The Eternals soon enough. But join us on Wednesday for a brand-new comic!

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