The Flash

Unearthed: Flash Comics #1, Part Two

We’re back, hanging out with the oldest college student ever!

PREVIOUSLY, ON THE FLASH: Our Jay Garrick is hot for Joan Williams, but she only cares about football. Her priorities are in the right place. So Jay’s back on the football team, but he’s been riding the bench, UNTIL:

This is like one of those 50s Disney flicks, where an incredible discovery is made, and it’s used for completely mundane purposes. Like Flubber, if you will. The Fred MacMurray one, of course, what’re you, simple? Pfft.

This is like someone telling you “I’m helping my dad invent a death ray to take over the world!” and you reply “I’m getting into accounting!”

I KNEW that last guy looked familiar! He’s the Grit kid from all the ads!

I think this is what’s the most weird about this series: Jay isn’t hiding his abilities. His costume doesn’t have a mask. He’s pretty much out in the open about it all.

Joan’s friend’s body language here is amazing.

Also, he talks to bullets.

Seriously. “Sieur Satan”? Also, “Duriel” is apparently the Angel of Pain. So where does “Serge Orloff” come from? It doesn’t match up!

Dude, they’re just mirrors. I don’t understand why you’re having such trouble with ’em. Unless you realize that Duriel’s reflection is huge next to Joan’s dad, somehow. That’s kinda weird.

Oh sure, an undertaker suddenly showing up at your house is completely commonplace.

Aw, that Jay, always the feminist!

So, wait, the “Faultless Four” only have three members. I don’t believe for a second that they’re actually scientists, based on the math alone.

This is the greatest tagline ever. It should be the subhead of all Flash comics: “The Flash: You’ve heard of him!”

Why is he even wearing a costume? And what the hell is he even SAYING here?

“Hang on, Major, we’re going for a ride!!”

Well, no, you’re just running. Ooh! But is the Flash making engine sounds as he goes? FUN!

He’s also running so fast he can’t hear what the guy’s saying. Next panel: Joan’s Dad is dead. Bummer!

Seriously, though, join us on Wednesday for Part Three of Flash Comics #!