Unearthed: The Demon #1, Part Two

Jason has passed out after defeating an animated suit of armor. As you do. But now, the old proboscis monkey’s paw is revealed — he’s a tool of Morgane le Fay! But oh, we’re about to learn a bit more about the ol’ girl.

Proboscis here kind of oversteps his bounds a bit with this comment but Morgane lets it go. Unusual, I’d say, given the type of villain we assume she is.

Yet she does comment on it, so I’d bet it stung just a bit. But hey, maybe when I reach this age I’ll be as forgiving. Let’s hope!

So we’ve learned that the target is Etrigan, the yellow-skinned demon we met earlier this issue. But Jason Blood knows nothing about this… what nefarious plans are afoot? Read on, effendi!

This bit’s hilarious to me. Jason’s outside with no memory of how he got there…

“Why, there’s been nobody livin’ in that ol’ house for YEARS!” It’s a classic, y’all.

This policeman’s comment asks the question: what’s his beat, anyway? Does he normally come out to these ruins just to see if anyone else has wandered in to have a weird experience? If so, shouldn’t there be at least a fence with a warning sign on it?

So wait, it’s a stone statue and it’s just walking. Why are you firing at it? Sure, it’s weird for a statue to come to life, but 1) your gun’s not gonna do anything to solid stone, and 2) is walking a crime? Hm. Maybe in this unnamed Central European country it is! Maybe these guys all get around by hopping! You don’t know!

I don’t know why, but this bit here kinda creeps me out.

I’ll tell you right now, I don’t appreciate Kirby giving us this teasing little tidbit about the guy’s missing arm, because he never returns to it. I NEED CLOSURE

Back to America, where we discover that not only does Jack Kirby do weird legs, but he apparently can’t draw butts! LOOK at that dude’s backside, it’s just a VOID! It’s messed-UP, y’all.

Later at Jason’s house party, we see ol’ JB’s dressed to impress with his Guy Fieri shirt. You can tell he’s fast ’cause of the flames.

GUH there’s always one of these guys, right? Life of the party, at least in his own mind. I may be way off, here, but in the movie version of this story, this character can ONLY be played by some second-tier actor from the 40s. Right? Look at him!

Jason, that looks NOTHING like a Rembrandt. Chill the hell out.

Lady, what part of saying the name “Rembrandt” made it sound like Jason knew him? It’s not like he called him “my bud, Remy”. I think this woman knows more than she’s letting on. LEADING THE WITNESS, YER HONNER


Holy cats, it’s the landlord! EVERYONE KEEP IT DOWN!

Seriously, though, why the hell is this thing wearing a suit? With a CRAVAT, no less!

It’s a dirty limerick.

“… leave town for a spell”, haha, I get it. Wow, Jason IS totally fascinating!

Please join us on Friday for Part Three of this frankly educational tale!